Thursday, May 16, 2013

Festina Lente

It's part of testing my limits and strength I suppose.  I had a wobble this morning - did too much, attempted to lift something just a little bit heavier than I can manage.  I didn't actually lift it but the slight bending and even the partial effort caused a back muscle to twinge.  I think I'm OK but I've scared myself.

When I get caught up in a task or project something akin to obsession - enthusiasm's shadow - can take over and common sense is all too easily cast aside.   I can't afford to let this happen in the future, it's how I first  injured my lower back four years ago.  Vigilance has to be the watchword when it comes to health, and to be truthful I'm not sure I know how to change, how not to be caught out again.

And I so want to have my life back.  I'm doing more, trying new things, making plans to venture out of the house.  All good but it would be terrible to let obsession and impatience ruin it.  For now at any rate, caution trumps everything else.

Now to let the panic subside.  Wait.  Think.  Breathe.  I need my guardian angel to materialise at moments like the one this morning, tap me on the shoulder and remind me.  Festina lente.  


Leslee said...

I guess it's easier to do the wrong thing when you're not right in the midst of the acute pain preventing doing anything. I've been working hard on my own shoulder/neck pain, feeling better today, and immediately ignoring proper posture and slipping into old patterns. I guess it's a constant need for reminders. I saw an article on Esther Gokhale, a San Francisco-based posture specialist and author, in the NY Times last weekend. Her students talked about having to remember to be aware of their posture - checking themselves in mirrors and such - but not beating themselves up when they slip. It's natural to forget. Anyway, good luck to you in your continuing recovery!

mm said...

Hi Leslee. You've put your finger on it - once the pain has gone and you're back in the swing of things again it's horribly easy to forget the essentials of self care/back care. I've checked out Esther Gokhale on Google. Interesting stuff. For me it's about safe activity as well as posture, critical though the latter is. Thanks for your support!

Starnitesky said...

Hi Mary, I visited your blog today and I am so pleased to see you are blogging again.

I really feel for you with your back, as you know I also have back problems and live in constant pain, it is not easy and can be very scary.I get so frustrated with not being able to do much (especially gardening at this time of the year). I can walk, and do, although painful.

I hope you continue to improve and will get back to a 'normal' life again.

Happy birthday for Friday, (just in case you don't post again this week), I hope you can enjoy your special day - and I hope that guardian angel stays close by.

Barbara (starnitesky)

mm said...

Hi Barbara. Welcome back. Good to see you again.